Don’t Let The Dust Settle On Your Dress

 As I was saying in my last blog, creating paper dresses is no easy task but I think that waiting for the supplies I ordered on line is even harder.  First of all, maybe I should mention why I’m creating these dresses before telling you about my second one.  The event is for a fashion show to benefit the Sidney Police Department.  They are trying to get funding to send one of the police officers to North Carolina for training in a canine unit.  We need a drug sniffing dog here.  The oil boom has brought the good, the bad and the illegal substances here and people sometimes go missing.  Anyway, the fashion show that I am planning is called: Rocking The Paper Dress and it entails making 12 dresses (one for each month to eventually have a calendar printed) all of my own design.  One thing that concerns me is how to store each dress until I’m finished with the last one.  I can’t fold them and I don’t want to let the weight of them hang too long and so I just keep buying more mannequins!  But 12!  Do I dare??  Where will I put them?  And so in order to keep dust from settling on the dress I drape a plastic bag over the top.  It’s hard making the dress first and then finding a model to fit into it afterwards. There’s no set deadline for the event.  It’s just whenever I get dresses, menu, music, lighting and other performances organized but it’s still an A.S.A.P. situation.  The second dress that I have started is sort of gothic looking.  It has a paper mache bodice and a tutu like skirt.  It’s red and black lace and maybe a tiara will even be involved.  But like I’ve said before, no preliminary sketch is carved in stone.  The dress calls the shots so if some characteristic I initially had in mind doesn’t quite come to be, that’s just how it is.

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Rocking The Paper Dress

Let’s just say that when it comes to making dresses out of toilet paper and paper towels, there are no allowances for “do overs.”  Every little move you make needs to be well thought out, tested on a swatch before doing and no preliminary sketch should be carved in stone.  After two weeks I finally finished my first dress in a series of twelve and I love the way it turned out.  It’s made from Charmin toilet paper and Bounty paper towels with crisscross straps in the back and a flounce-like hemline that sways in the breeze.  Four layers thick really sturdies things up!  Although subconsciously, I couldn’t help but wonder if the model wearing the dress were to make her way through a crowded restaurant, would somebody have the nerve to wipe their mouth on her as she passed by. That would be one of those incidents in the short life of a paper dress.  Eleven more dresses to go before the show begins and I’m learning all the way.

How To Outsmart A Panty Thief

 It appears my panties have gone missing.  Not all of them though…only my Victoria’s Secrets.  It took approximately 3 weeks for me to notice since I have so many, but as the days went by it became very apparent that there were some major gaps in my underwear drawer.  Now we all know (because I’ve mentioned it before) that I live in an apartment building which means that I share a laundry facility with other tenants.  Since I don’t have time to sit downstairs and keep a watchful eye on my laundry, but rather rely on a timer, I needed to come up with a solution to keeping a panty thief at bay.  This is what I came up with:  1.  Find a man’s tee shirt that doesn’t seem to get a lot of use anymore.  2.  Then I monogrammed the words “PEDRO’S JOCKSTRAPS underneath the Harley Davidson logo to serve as a deterrence if anyone wanted to take the shirt or rifle through it’s contents.  3.  Sew the bottom hem shut.  Sew the neck and one sleeve partially shut leaving a one to two inch opening.  This will allow the ebb and flow of water to still get your undies clean.  Put Velcro or a zipper in the other sleeve to stick those beloved Victoria’s Secrets inside.  4. And last but not least, if this doesn’t work I’ll be releasing the dogs of war!  Wish me luck.